Friday, October 12, 2012

Sexuality and Place: Part I, an Introduction

In 5 Sections


  • Introduction
  • Atmosphere
  • Population
  • Politics
  • Safety and Welfare


Many lenses have been used to address sexuality, considering economics, race, and gender to meta-topics such as privilege and power. The purpose of this essay is to propose a framework for dissecting the relationship between sexuality and place. The essay is intended to be a flexible, evolving document open to reevaluation and revision. As a short, introductory essay, this will serve to propose the main topics for discussions of place and how they are also important headings for evaluating sexuality. As an introduction, this essay assumes that a link between sexuality and place can and will be explored more critically in the adjoining string of essays as well as by other writers interested in this project.

Atmosphere

Place cannot exist without atmosphere, which includes the basic ideas of geography and environment. Certainly in looking towards a future with impending environmental disasters, difficulties providing clean water and overpopulation make geography and environment among the most important problems facing the global community. The intersection of sexuality and atmosphere as an aspect of space holds the potential to confront these problems head-on.

Geography here refers to where a population is located. In it I include borders (natural and otherwise), access to bodies of water, geographic isolation or accessibility for movement/travel/migration, population density, micro geography (city planning, communality, accessibility, infrastructure), rurality and urbanity, forms of transportation and their availability, period of consecutive habitation, and perhaps many I have overlooked. The construction of a sexuality is directly shaped by the movement of people. The ability to move populations of people, move amongst populations and restrictions upon movement all impact potential for sexual diversity. Geography also directly impacts issues of reproduction where population density and access to resources are concerned. Without including the impact of geography, there is no place for understanding sexuality in this framework.

As briefly mentioned before, the environment a crucial factor in imagining the sustainability of our future. So too, I believe that the environment is important for considering the formation of and future of sexuality. By environment I am referring to the natural endowments of place. These include weather, soil quality, water quality (and again I include access to bodies of water), habitats, ecosystems, altitude, environmental impact from human populations, environmental impact from natural disasters, native and invasive species, air quality, temperateness, the impact of global climate change and population-level responses to environmental challenges. No list of environmental concerns can be complete. When issues of sexuality are intersected with environment, an interesting interplay of sexual ethics with regards to environmental ethics opens a dialogue I am excited to flush out in depth. It might also be interesting to look at environmental quality and sexual health or look at aligning a sexual politics with an environmental politics. As an actively evolving discourse, environmental issues may well be the principle concern for the future discourse on sexuality.

Population

Population is a very complicated framework mostly because it is very difficult to capture an accurate picture of any population, past or present. A census records numerical information and allows for the identification of trends, however it is difficult if not impossible to spot trends in cultural attitudes, hopes, aspirations and desires of a population. Further difficulties arise when addressing sexuality, as many populations discourage by cultural self-policing open conversations on sexuality. As it is often reflects the most privately held aspects of a populations, when sexuality is discussed it is subject to exaggeration, the dissemination of erroneous information, omission for modesty, caricature, stereotype, aggressive prohibition or utter denial. In short, it is difficult to learn anything about sexuality on a population level. This being said, I think it is somewhat possible to discuss sexuality in a population in the following frameworks: density, culture and diversity.

One of the easiest ways to measure a population is by density, simply how close or far people are aways from each other in a given place. There are some basic speculations which can be made about a population based on its density, however chiefly amongst them is simply how much interaction takes place within that population. Density also encompasses the degree to which a population must share physical spaces as well as resources. As a titillating response to the idea of sexuality and population density, one might discuss the recent proliferation of location-based "social" networking applications such as Grindr, whose utility may vary given population densities.

Discussing culture is difficult for all the same reasons it is difficult to discuss sexuality within a population, for given the variance, flexibility and constantly changing nature of culture even within a discrete population. I want to be very specific about what I mean by culture in place: culture as a series of widely distributed and discussed artifacts within a population. Therein, I mean that not only culture can be evaluated as a set of practices and beliefs, but also by the products by and for culture, the tangible aspects of culture within a population. By accessing culture through its artifacts, something can be said in general about the widely circulated information, opinions and mores about sexuality given these touchstones. An interesting current touchstone within the wildly diverse population of "American women" is the book Fifty Shades of Gray by E.L. James, whose circulation has attracted a wide readership and an even wider cultural conversation about sexuality. In the framework I am describing, one might be able to investigate the artifact itself for the idea of sexuality contained within to dissect the sexual idea/l being widely circulated within a population at a particular cultural moment.

Diversity is a topically critical aspect of sexuality, and so I mean it here in a specific way in regards to population. Diversity within population encompasses both variety as well as homogeneity within a population, measured perhaps as a continuum. Of course diversity acknowledges religion, gender, economics, ability, race, culture, etc., but in terms of population it also refers to how much these aspects of difference come into contact, co-exist, intermingle or create divides. The density of a population could then perhaps suggest less about sexuality when that population is a homogeneous one. The intersection of diversity/population/place and sexuality must be considered to be accurate. Some aspects of diversity are easier to measure, such as levels of educational achievement or taxed income while others, such as diversity of political or moral opinion are unstable and therefore quite difficult to address. In any case, diversity in a population is a necessary consideration for sexuality and place.

Politics

Sexual politics and the politics of space are hot topics for academic writing. In combining politics with concepts of sexuality in place, I am interested in focusing on a reciprocal question: how do politics shape place, and how does place shape politics? I would investigate the  ways in which laws create or diminish sexual space, how the establishment of sexual space is reflected by laws, and moreover the extent to which political discourse inscribes sexuality in place.

In June of 1969, sexual minorities in Greenwich Village, New York fought the prevailing political system which threatened to literally dismantle their sense of place at the Stonewall Inn. That same political system caused similar places to be secret, discreet, hidden places. This is a well-documented and pivotal example of the was in which a politics shapes a sexual landscape. Other examples include the various prohibitions against various forms of sexuality (which continue to be slowly dismantled in the United States through the US Supreme Court) that create discreet space, and how the distribution of information about and access to birth control has resulted in politically divided and stigmatized spaces. This top-down, politics then space concept is however not the only functional concept.

The top-down creation of discreet spaces had also been fundamental for grassroots political organization. The existence of the 1960s sexual minority hang-out place organized, radicalized, and galvanized the demands those who would eventually fight back before, through and after 1969 to defend their place, first, then their right to openly claim space elsewhere. I am not suggesting that these grassroots activists were creating demands out of territorialism, rather they were making a far-reaching claim to place as a human right, for which they asserted that sexuality is a part of a whole humanity. There are many great examples of place, self-created or imposed, impacting the landscape of sexual politics as a whole.

There is a third aspect of place and sexual politics which is more overarching; it is the general political climate. Political climate is another difficult set of changing attitudes and beliefs that are hard to measure or evaluate. A basic example would be the issues of sexuality currently up for discussion in an election and how the political discourse makes space more or less sexually open or regressive. In the 2004 federal election, the political climate focussed on the question of gay marriage. The incumbent president supported a Constitutional ban on "gay marriage." The political climate had an indefinable, invisible yet prevalent presence in place, where the election had dominance over national discourse. In shared spaces, it became necessary to engage in the political debate, to be involved in a political climate. I would argue that political climate depends on particularly divisive issues, strong or highly visible politicians or the presence of an election to have an invasive effect in place.

Safety and Welfare

Safety and welfare are crucial to any conversation about place in general, and in great particularity to sexuality and space. I have chosen to combine them to emphasize that they are two sides of the same coin: an increase in safety (security, peace of mind) is also an increase in welfare, when welfare (well-being, access to resources) is diminished so too is safety. There are many issues related intimately to politics, such as the establishment of armed forces, the enforcement of safety regulations, and a provision of basic welfare such as healthcare, shelter, nourishment or education. The ability to express, explore, discover and organize around sexuality is greatly impacted by individual security and welfare. For instance, the national debate around (the strictly narrow) sexual minorities and their right to marry has overshadowed some much more basic concerns such as housing security. It continues to be legal in some places to deny housing on the basis of sexual orientation. In this example, the pursuit of safety, or security of private space, may well be more important than achieving political recognition in more abstract terms such like marriage.

I also address safety and welfare to highlight how social climate can greatly impact place. A prevailing transphobic social climate can disrupt a stable place or sense of place for transgendered individuals. I bring up this example because the threat of transphobic violence is very real today, it diminishes one's sense of safety in many places. Furthermore, transgendered individuals are routinely denied the correct basic healthcare. In another example, many homeless teens have been put out on the street because of their sexual orientation, robbed of the space of occupying childhood, school, shelter among many other concerns. It is this unique relationship between a homophobic/transphoic culture which directly results in the end of safety, welfare, and place. I look forward to a future where safety and welfare are considered human rights rather than humanitarian problems.

END

In my attempt to "ground" the issue of sexuality in place, I do so as a reflective exercise to understand my own relationship to sexuality and place. Given the opportunity to expand the introductory portion of this essay, I might address economics in two parts, global economics (global sexuality and power) and personal economics (who participates in a sexual economy, how place is created or destroyed by sexual economics). I may also choose to add a strictly philosophical essay which deconstructs the idea of place, given that it itself is an unstable category, entitled something to the effect or, "Place without Space." I welcome your comments and look forward to advancing a dialogue.


Thursday, October 11, 2012

Artist>Art>Audience>Medium

Let's consider you're perspective:

If people fail to perceive something as art, or as a performance,
does it then become not art or a performance?
I think when it goes into the world, art is at the mercy of its audience.

I am trying, as a project to me more open and less binary in opinion. I want to make sure that you are not trying to suggest that art cannot exist without audience. An essay, for instance which I have not written, is it a work of art without an audience? Is it a work of art if I never write it?

Chew on that for a while.

I don't want to get arrested to be published, though I might enjoy the aftermath of gaining notoriety. How much can we consider a work of art as separate from the notoriety of the artist. The relationship between the art and the artist is to me more important to the relationship between the audience and the art. I would like to make a diagram which describes the relationship between the artist, the art, the audience and the medium.

So, the sexuality question...


At first, I wasn't sure what you meant entirely.

But I'm seeing that there's certain cultural norms and contexts that inform our sexualities-- or, that sexuality can't happen in a vacuum. Can it be winnowed down to an essential that is independent of context?

Right now, I don't think so. But... I'm willing to change my mind if I determine that my sexuality is independent of context.

Do you think we were engaging in what you'd call rural sexualities?
How could we classify that?

Celibacy?
Monoamory?
Meets-a-palooza?
Not dating women well?
Craigslist dates?
Whiskey instead of making out?
Sex where there's dirt?
Hooking up with the wrong people?


Remember when I told you I'd never make babies with anyone from Walla Walla because
  1. I don't necessarily want to make babies
  2. the Walla Walla gene pool is a little-- [insert word for "everybody's cousins" here]?

So, sexuality in this context?
It's become more physical for me in certain, mundane ways. I get looked at in the street because I'm brown-haired, blue-eyed, and I don't carry myself like most women here. My clothing is different enough that I stand out, even though I've tried to model my dress after the fashion here.
I wear rings on my Apollo fingers, earrings from Erich, a watch from Nina and Andreas, and a bracelet from my Uncle Phil and Auntie Marianna. This is my regular weight of metal anymore. This has changed the way that I create hand gestures, make explanations, and write. These things about my body certainly impact others' perception of my sexuality, and I believe that they impact my own sense of it.

Never Neutral

I'm never going to feel neutral about anything here.


  1. I think labor unions are nonexistent. I was told today that I'd be teaching six classes tomorrow.
  2. People can't properly tell me where stuff is-- they'll tell me in English and Turkish '204' when they really mean '24' or the 'literature building' when they mean the 'laboratory building'.
  3. When I make suggestions that I perceive to be reasonable, my coworkers stare at me blankly.
  4. But this really wonderful, important polyglot has offered to give me private lessons in academic Turkish.
  5. People with connections in Ankara and Istanbul really want to take me to those places and take care of me.
  6. People are always giving me tea, chocolate, cookies, peaches, TyloHot and generally fattening me up.
  7. People ask me to proofread school exams.
  8. One of my coworkers has asked me to co-author a presentation for an EFL conference in November. Cool-- I feel like a professional.

I'm going away for the weekend to Zonguldak, which is another town on the Black Sea. I hope I can tell you all about it when I get back. Maybe Monday?

Tuesday, October 9, 2012

The Face Question

I've been thinking about this one for a while.

"What is the intellectual property here?
The face?
The caption?
The image?
The writing?"

Then I think, maybe that's not the question.

Do you think you could pursue a critical reading audience
through connections made at art performances and operas?

Consider this: http://www.portlandopera.org/supers
Although it probably conflicts with your work schedule.





If people fail to perceive something as art, or as a performance,
does it then become not art or a performance?
I think when it goes into the world, art is at the mercy of its audience.

Thursday, October 4, 2012

Is my face original, publishable work?

I ask this question because I'm creating some goals for my "new life." At the top of this list is to be published, in anyway, anywhere. I have been publishing independently and electronically for years, though the most successful blog to date (ithinkourwaiterisdrunk) has only reached around 3500 page views, and I assume that I account for about half of those.

Busted Paper, Oct. 2012
So I came across Busted Paper, a regionally franchised photo publication which takes publicly available information, namely mugshots with corresponding official charges. It looks like a fucked-up yearbook; a name appears below a mugshot then a brief, coded crime. Where you would read "JV Tennis, NHS" in a yearbook, Busted lists, "POSS METH, RECK ENDANGER" or for poor Paris Ryce, "MENACING." So I'm wondering if I can consider Busted to be a potential space for submissions. Can't you see it now? "S. L. Sanchez, INDECNT EXPOSE II, SOLICITATION." The only question is, though it would be a matter of public record, can I also claim that my face is a part of my body of work? It would after all be illegal to use my image to advertise for monetary gain without my consent.

 Yes, I'm sure I can find better, probably easier ways to get published, I'm just gathering my thoughts on my approach. Angle and beat are just as important as style and content in the shrinking world of print media.
Multnomah County Library, Main Branch

Other goals:
Find a community of critical readers
Look at art, attend performances
Run
Community-level social activism
Revive S. L. Sanchez, the writer/social critic
Recognize people on the street, sometimes
Attend high-cultural events i.e. opera, ballet

Last night I attended a tribute performance in honor of the late John Cage's birthday, a rare performance of his landmark minimalist or "New" work Silence (1961), a piece randomly organized by the roll of dice. This performance incorporated found sound objects and dance performance. As with most New music from the area, there is no climax other than that which might be spontaneously created by an act of chance. The dances were technically not coordinated to the music whatsoever, thus creating an atmospheric space rather than a spectacle or a performance in any conventional sense. A lot of the audience tried (though ultimately failed) to view the piece as a performance. It impossible to take in all the dancers at once, since they were strewn about the large, multi-level space. The music gave no indication of progression and the overall effect was atmospheric. I attended this performance, almost quite out of the blue on a Wednesday night, then had drinks with the creators and performers. This kind of shit just don't happen much in Walla Walla.

A Portland Circus on Cage's Silence, featuring Kaj-anne Pepper, far right

But I am living.

Dear Bruce,

The bureaucracy is making me crazy and people keep telling me not to get intimate with men.


But I am living. Strangely. I'm learning backgammon strategy, staying up to ungodly hours on Skype, and planning lessons. I've been told by my boss that I cannot, cannot make photocopies of materials to supplement the books. I can only teach what's in the books. That's the Turkish education system for you.


I don't have a picture of my theology and tarot reading books-- that'd be too racy. Oh! What do you think of doing tarot readings via Skype? We can have you hold your focus while I shuffle. You'll just have to hold it really hard.

Bed also serves as desk (because internet cord only stretches so far) and drying rack.



Chair also serves as drying rack for clothes. In fact, anywhere we can hang something wet, we do.


My kitchen and my actual drying rack. Not pictured here: the piss-hole.

Friday, September 28, 2012

Hanging with the roommie.

Daytime in the new household.

The dog's name is Mags. She is an exceptionally attentive blue healer. Her focus would manifest itself as human autism.

Quang is friendly and acts in earnest to get to know me. He gets a lot of his food from his mother, who sends him carefully tupper-wared left-overs. Without her he may starve or eat exclusively at Burger King.

I don't see much of Will, we have opposite schedules. I think he likes to drink whiskey and play video games.

The library is nearby and I have made my first friend with a spectacular biography about Samuel Steward, an early 20th century sexual renegade, academic, writer, pornographer and tattoo artist. He's the American Jean Jenet. I'm sure you will not be able to find this book there, but be on the look-out for "Secret Historian" by Justin Spring.


This is an image from Dustin's oddly themed "Meow Fest," a catastrophic affair for which I had no prepared costume. Dustin lent me this. We had a pretty lovely time!

Wednesday, September 19, 2012

Urban Sexuality

I am having enough time, getting dangerously close to this inevitable move, to consider how enjoying sexuality in the city. How will an urban lifestyle inform my sexuality.

Similarly, how does living in a foreign country inform your sexuality. Let's wait and see.

Saturday, September 15, 2012

Wedding or Circumcision?

I was riding in the car when Yavuz handed me the phone and Abdullah invited me to his mother's house to pre-func for a wedding.
When I got off the phone, Yavuz told me that Abdullah had really meant to invite me to a circumcision. Now I don't know what to think, but I'm going either way.

Friday, September 14, 2012

Housing!

You won't miss out on visiting me in Bolu, I think.

Trying to satisfy three [American? Do I even want to address that here?] women with one apartment is proving to be a daunting task.

There are no Turkish colleagues/ host families who want to (or can) take us in. Furnished apartments in city centre are a bit sketchy and 700TL/month, which is too much, according to all sources. Unfurnished apartments haven't been easy.

I am thinking of you often, and I totally empathize with your housing-finding situation! Or how it's been.


I haven't had the mental energy to deal with the real business of addressing e-mails, but I may tomorrow after  ten-ish hours of sleep (in response to Steve's query). I've been averaging five in Ankara, and my last two nights there I stayed up conversing until all I got was three each.

A couple people there you would've liked. One of them, Olivia, has gone to Kilis on the Syrian border, and I'm considering whether I want to risk a visit.

I wish I had an epiphany. I'm actually in rather dire need of one right now.

Thursday, September 13, 2012

Pornography in public

It was 8:30 or so at TMac's. I guess my favorite part of this encounter was how it started.

I see a sketchy-looking youngish guy peering into the restaurant from the inner-entrance. After I finish up some things, I go out to greet him and find some 30-something Seattle yuppies scoping out the menu. Here's the best part: I ask yuppie guy, "Will it be three of you for this evening?" He was very awkward about this then said rather intentionally rudely, "We are not with him," indicating sketchy guy. Someone with a sense of humor would have had something clever to say about it. I liked making yuppie guy uncomfortable. The couple left and Sketch sneaked his way to the bathroom, which at TMac's requires a journey through every part of the restaurant.

I lost control of the situation and a well-meaning co-worker engaged with Sketch. I guess he ordered and paid for some food, because every time I approached him to ask if he needed something (and subsequently ask him to leave), she intervened. He was making us all uncomfortable hanging out by the server station. He asked me if I drank whiskey. I said no. The last straw came when I came upon him gazing unabashedly at a hard-core pornographic magazine. I asked him to leave immediately, but then once again well-meaning co-worker came to his rescue. No one else there noticed what he was looking at, probably because none of them have an interest in reading.

Anyway, he hung outside the restaurant for some time, making some older ladies afraid to leave so I had to call the cops. They recovered a fork which was on his person and asked me if it was ours, and when I indicated that it was, yes, indeed ours the officer begged me to press theft charged. I refused. Later, I found out the our friend the well-meaner had given him the fork. I think there is a problem with being too nice, or maybe I'm just an asshole. The cop told me that he had been bothering many businesses tonight and they were chomping at the bit for him to commit a crime for which they could lock him up.

In other news, I've found a place to live with some sports fans in Portland and my dad is coming out to help me move. I saw Steve Brooks tonight and he asked me if I'd talked to you lately; he wants to have some updating done on his sign. I suggested that he sent his chalk board to turkey.

Tuesday, September 11, 2012

This is what desperation looks like:

Yikes! I'm not ready to move into this mess.


$450 / 800ft² - room to rent in my apartment (my apartment )


Date: 2012-09-11, 11:42AM PDT
 xxxxxx.xxxxx@hous.craigslist.org [Errors when replying to ads?]

Hi there my name is Anjie, I'm 25 years old and my ex just moved out recently, he had been keeping my half the rent money n not paying so I'm behind from last month and now It's the first again... I have a one bedroom apartment he took the bed so only my dresser really is in the room, I don't use it. I sleep in the living room n need help on rent now... you won't need to worry about electricity or food I get food stamps and the whole place is available for you to hang out in too. I will charge a nonrefundable deposit on top of 450 rent so move in today would be $650 and I will need a extra hundred throughout this month n next here n there if u can help me pay off the fees on late rent so we remain living here lol . lol I also have 2 cats that's it. I'm a very calm chill quite and easy going person I do smoke cigarettes and have my occasional beer nothing crazy I rarely have anyone over even.... if your interested let me know ASAP cuz it is the first and I need this paid between us for this month.... email might be a good contact method or txt to initially get ahold of me so I know the number get a lot of bogus calls on my cell don't answer anymore to numbers I don't know..... 503-XXX-XXXX
Powell Blvd. at S.E. 67th (google map) (yahoo map)
  • cats are OK - purrr
  • Location: my apartment
  • it's NOT ok to contact this poster with services or other commercial interests
PostingID: 324492039x

Situation

In retaliation of my ongoing fight to find a home, I created a craigslist performance piece. No luck with this tactic, either:


Jersey Shore-type situation
Date: 2012-09-07, 11:28PM PDT

I've been having a hard time finding a place to live, but what I'm looking for is really simple: 
I'm looking for a "Jersey Shore" type situation. This means you must not only have a hot tub, but it must also not be filled with grenades (grenades: not-so-nice looking ladies). I live by the following acronym: G.T.L., I go to the gym, I tan, and I do laundry. If you're going to get jealous of my eight-pack abs, copious cologne, my fresh fade and my unnaturally constant chestnut tan, we're not going to work out. 
Ideal housemates like hooking up, going out, and throwing objects while drunk. Everybody here on craigslist is looking for a "drama-free" arrangement, so that should leave room enough for me. The more drama that ensues, the more exposure I will get, and let's face it, so will you! I want to live in a place with people encouraging me to drink too much so that I will get into meaningless arguments about aforementioned hooking up, going out and throwing objects while drunk. The perfect housemates support themselves by working in a t-shirt store six or seven hours a week; I'll be happy to commiserate when you come home to complain about how you work too much. Shared land line a must. Don't touch my hair. 
So get back to me, I can't wait to be your housemate so we can have t-shirt time! 
  • it's NOT ok to contact this poster with services or other commercial interests
PostingID: 3257875354

Friday, September 7, 2012

View from the Back

It's rare that I'll get to keep a picture I take. My camera use has become an exercise in loss and suffering. 

Thursday, September 6, 2012

Rooms

I have written about two dozen or more e-mails this week to strangers with rooms in Portland. I have ended up with about 4 responses, had two interviews, and have not found the perfect fit. That is not to say that it won't come along. I just need to cultivate a practice of patience and keep the faith that the right thing will fall into place.

In order to cultivate this process, for each ad I respond I write an individualized e-mail, addressing specific points in the ad and highlighting different desirable qualities. For the various ads that express need for in independent, mostly unseen roommate, I mention that I will be staying with my partner a lot of the time. For people looking for "someone to be a part of our little community, have family dinners, etc.," I mention that I am looking for new friends and a sense of community since I'm new to town. For prospects with dogs, who usually post pictures of their dogs, I self-identify as a dog-lover and go on to praise how particularly cute their dog is. Through this all, I cannot say that I am being deceptive, just not comprehensive. I don't have the time to respond with long, descriptive essays about my values, habits, personality, idiosyncrasies, aspirations, abilities or interests. That sort of information is revealed in increments, and I doubt that the best writers could possibly suggest a sense of this information without being long-winded. So I'm just clinging to my strengths: punctuation, complete sentences, a moderately sophisticated vocabulary and flattery.

I guess we're in the middle of the same project: strangers, homes, new places, and negotiation. There's no guarantee that I am even dealing with people who speak the same language (of course I am being more figurative here). Put the good energy out for my search and I'll do the same for you. Best of luck.

Monday, September 3, 2012

Fragments, Epiphanies

First, I am grateful and glad to be sharing this space with you, Favorite Hipster of Mine.

You'll know I'm working on another, quite diurnal (see Latin relation to journal) blog. I have considered how to format my space here so that I'm not repeating myself unless that process proves useful.

If you remember, at 1304 I was not only collecting Agatha Christie but also immersing myself in James Joyce's Stephen Hero and A Portrait of the Artist as a Young Man. In these, I found 'the epiphany'-- an event that I had really only experienced before in terms of the Catholic holiday.

I won't get into too much detail yet, but I want to note know that after these few years, I'm developing an issue with idea of epiphany as discrete event instead of process. But we'll see-- perhaps in doing a more in-depth, long-term study of the concept and its occurrence in my experiences, I'll find out something contrary to my expectations.

Last, I want to remind the audience that I'm not a dirty or self-righteous hippie.

Wednesday, August 29, 2012

Welcome Back

We've come a long way since then.

We were mostly single then, you were flirting with that guy with the rosy cheeks and I was dating that blonde kid with the skinny neck. Now we are in some pretty solid relationships (beyond the friendship which we both already enjoy). We were trying to take in the European new wave oeuvre film-by-film. We had a mountain of cable. We co-owned a Christmas tree. We had adjacent bedrooms. I sat on a stool a lot and played some sort of game. I loved my job. You had just started collecting Agatha Christie novels. We cooked.

Now, we're both moving somewhere else within the span of a month. We are uncertain about tomorrow, by which I mean tomorrow, tomorrow. You have two cats and I have three plants. They are all alive. We have lovers well-known by our families. The future is uncertain.

Perhaps it was better then because we weren't looking so straight-forward as we are now. A lot is in question but a lot is locked-in now, so our path has definitions but is as of yet uncertain.

I will be sure to take many pictures so I can show them to you. I will be frequent. All I ask from you is that you tell it as you feel it: don't save up a story, be immediate and I will do the same. We will enjoy a revolution and it started at 1304.

Monday, May 4, 2009

Seal:Soul

"... I've been loving you-ooouu-oouu for so long, I don't wanna stop nowwwwww..."

I've driven back and forth from south of town and College Place and back a lot in the past few days, always with Seal's latest album on the stereo. Thinking a good deal about the upcoming move, describing to anyone who'll listen my fascist tendencies.

Fascism being my term for pure, unadulterated self-interest. For not wanting to be accountable to anyone else, even my best friend. Barely to myself.

And the top of my list of New Year's Resolutions was: "learn to love better".

Friday, May 1, 2009

Getting Laid?

Good on ya.







I think I just realized the implications of a serious attempt to "cultivate friendship" until next Spring.
Yikes.